It is a gift to be a parent.
It is a gift because it is an assignment from God. He is trusting you with His special possessions. (Psalm 127:3)
As parents we should always keep in mind that our children are God’s and they are on loan for us to raise for His Kingdom purposes.
It is a privilege, a responsibility and a blessing to raise our children in the ways of the Lord
If you are a parent, know that you were created, called, for this task.
Raising children is no simple job. In fact, it is very challenging.
The Bible gives us a lot of guidelines on raising our children (Click here to read some of theses verses). God never leaves us without His guidance.
My children are 18, 20 and 22 years old now. All three of them have chosen to love the Lord and walk in His ways. For this I am incredibly grateful.
I give all the praise to Jesus as to why my children have grown up to be such well rounded, God-loving and people-loving young adults.
However, like all parents, we’ve had our ups and downs raising our three children. Here are some tips from my personal experience on parenting.
1. Believe in your child and accept their individuality
God has created each one of us unique (Psalm 139-13-14) and none of us is perfect. We are all born with a sinful nature.
Welcome your child’s behavior with love and understanding, no matter how challenging it may be for you.
One way of showing that you believe and accept your child’s uniqueness is by being interested in what they are interested in and not telling them what you think they should get involved with.
2. Encourage your child often.
Let them know how much they are loved.
As parents it is our job to let our children know how valuable they are to God, and to us.
We all need to be affirmed. An innocent young one ought to hear often that they are special and that they are loved.
Say the words “I love you” every opportunity you may have to say it.
I asked my eldest son what did he think was the best thing his dad and I did as parents. This is what he said- “you loved us unconditionally.”
3. Communicate with your child consistently.
Good communication is the key to a successful relationship.
Even though I irritated my children at times, I always insisted on knowing what was going on with them.
Try to get your children to talk about their feelings as often as possible.
Make sure you listen-listen to their hearts.
Learn to “read between the lines.”
Ask a lot of questions:
Ask who they are going to be hanging out with.
Ask what they are going to be doing.
Ask where they are going.
Ask if the parents are going to be there. I use to call the parents to validate the plans.
Your children won’t like all the questioning, but that’s okay.
You can be your child’s friend later in life when they are young adults. While you are raising them it is more important that you be their parent first.
4. Have healthy family boundaries
God has boundaries with us. Why? because He loves us.
Tough love is the highest form of love. Teaching your children about their limits will teach them that there are consequences to our choices. This is a critical life lesson.
The key to boundaries is to have a consequence attached to it. So, make sure you have a strong consequence that goes with your boundary.
My husband and I always had very strict boundaries with our children. They learned at a young age that they wouldn’t get away with much from us. We also always followed through.
The one boundary that has helped our family a lot is that we have no family secrets.
We agreed years ago to be honest with one another-always.
I believe this has built a sense of security in our three children.
5. Live by example and imitate Christ to your children
This can only happen if you have a personal walk with Jesus that is genuine. Your children are wiser than you realize. They will sense your authenticity.
6. Make your home a safe, secure, and happy place.
Laugh often.
Share each other’s burdens.
Share each other’s joys.
Share each other’s struggles.
Invite their friends over often.
7.Pray for your child constantly.
This is probably the single most important thing you can do for your children.
Never under estimate the power of your prayers.
As I close this, I am thinking of some wonderful Christian parents I know whose children, despite all their godly guidance, have chosen the ways of the world and are not walking with the Lord. All that these parents have is their prayers.
And this is the bottom line…we all have free will. This means that no matter how much we try to raise our children in God’s ways, they can still choose to reject Him.
Raising warriors for Jesus is not an easy task. There were many seasons where we felt we were failing as parents.
I’m glad we never gave up hope or confidence in God. He helped us get through the difficult days.
We must remember, we can only do our part. The rest is up to the Lord and the individual child and his/her choices.
Please leave me a comment on what has worked for you as a parent.
“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” ~Proverbs 22:6
Tweeny, once again you share great words of wisdom. Thank you for encouraging young families to remember that their precious children belong to God. As parents we are only the stewards of these little ones. Thank you for your additional comment understanding that even if all the right things were done in raising our young to live for Him, it doesn’t always work out that way. We just need to keep praying and keep trusting, but this is hard to do when they become 30 years old or more. You have 3 beautiful adult children who love Jesus and are amazing people. God is good, and you are blessed my friend.
Sherry,
As always, I appreciate your encouragement and support of my writings.It is hard to keep believing and trusting God to answer our prayers when nothing seems to be changing. But often the miracle is right around the corner when we give up. I once heard a preacher say something about our prayers being answered afterwe are gone. I love you sis. You are a strong woman of faith and an inspiration to many, including me.
AWESOME!
Thank you:)